{"product_id":"table-manners-are-overrated-crochet-duster","title":"Table Manners Are Overrated Crochet Duster","description":"\u003ch1\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTABLE MANNERS ARE OVERRATED\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eGrandma's tablecloth has officially entered her hot girl era.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ccode\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSPECIMEN 001\/001\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/code\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTHE FILE\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMeet \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTable Manners Are Overrated\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, a one-of-a-kind crochet duster handmade from a rescued doily-style crochet tablecloth. Because apparently covering a dining room table wasn't a big enough career.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFeaturing intricate floral crochet patterns, dramatic wide bell sleeves, delicate openwork detailing, and beautiful scalloped edges, this cream-colored statement layer is what happens when vintage-inspired home décor gets a very unexpected promotion.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThrow it over a colorful outfit, a simple tank and jeans, or your favorite dress. It adds texture, drama, and a little \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“where the hell did you find that?”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cspan\u003e energy without even trying.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt's romantic. It's dramatic. It's slightly ridiculous.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnd yes, it used to be a tablecloth.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTHE EVIDENCE\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSize:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e ONE SIZE\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBust:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 60\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eLength:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 48\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSleeve Length:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 29\"\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFit:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e RELAXED\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMaterial:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Repurposed crochet tablecloth — fiber content to be confirmed\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eColor:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Ivory \/ cream\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePattern:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Floral crochet openwork\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDetails:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Wide bell sleeves, scalloped edges, textured crochet\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eClosure:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e [CONFIRM OPEN FRONT OR CLOSURE]\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOriginal Life:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Crochet tablecloth\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCurrent Life:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Dramatic entrance specialist\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eQuantity:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 001\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTHE MUTATION\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eA rescued crochet tablecloth was transformed into an entirely new wearable piece, preserving the original decorative patterns, intricate texture, and beautiful scalloped edges.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eInstead of letting this gorgeous textile spend another decade underneath a centerpiece, we gave it sleeves and a much better social life.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTABLECLOTH → DUSTER.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe dining room has been notified.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFIT CHECK\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis is a handmade, one-of-a-kind garment, so please use the actual measurements rather than relying only on the listed size.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe open crochet construction creates a lightweight, airy appearance, while the dramatic sleeves add movement and shape.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eLayer it over your favorite outfits for an unexpected statement.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHUMAN-MADE DISCLAIMER\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis specimen was handmade from a rescued crochet tablecloth with a previous life before becoming clothing. Small variations, imperfections, or signs of its former existence may be present.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWe don't call that damage. We call it evidence.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCARE\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDue to the delicate crochet construction, hand wash gently in cold water with a mild detergent if the textile is washable. Do not wring or twist. Reshape and lay flat to dry.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAvoid snagging the crochet on jewelry, zippers, or rough surfaces.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cspan\u003eREPLICATION STATUS\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTHE TABLE HAS BEEN CLEARED.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOne tablecloth. One duster. Zero dinner parties required.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eServing looks instead of dinner. 👽\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Modern Alien","offers":[{"title":"One size","offer_id":51487513608359,"sku":"ALIEN-252-TAB-ONE","price":185.23,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0438\/8864\/0167\/files\/60_823d329f-1d73-49ec-a67d-e707cc9fee44.png?v=1791570610","url":"https:\/\/themodernalien.com\/en-ca\/products\/table-manners-are-overrated-crochet-duster","provider":"The Modern Alien","version":"1.0","type":"link"}